Waiting again

I could have written more this morning, but I am off to begin finishing the current task... that isn*t it either.  Of course, it used to be part of it.  Now it isn*t.  Off to get my volunteer paperwork in order.

Sometimes what I think

Is the next thing, isn*t it.

So I simply wait.

Green miles

This morning I heard that I did not get the volunteer job for which I interviewed last week.  The interview went well, but I figured I wouldn*t get it.  I find myself a little more free.  A little disappointed, sure, but free. I have no idea what August will bring, but it seems to hold more green miles of open space.

The trip

Through the terminal moraine

Was worth

Every green mile.

The conversation

Nee interview

Allowed me to say certain things

Out loud.

I also figured

I would not get an offer.

Still

The trip was worth

Every green mile.

Here I sit

Clematis in full purple bloom

On the front pillar.

August holds

Wonderful open space.

Green miles

Of wonderful

Open space.

Volunteer

This experience was 36 years ago, almost to the month.  I have learned some things in the intervening years.  Some things, however, seem to be a part of a life pattern.  36 years out I wake up and think:  Oh... here I am again!

I began my work life

As a volunteer

In Ohio.

I had a desk in the corner

Of the community room

In a housing project

In South Toledo.

The desk held

A lockable dial phone.

With two days

Of paperwork training

Under my belt,

Age 22,

With a Classics major,

I was told to counsel troubled teenagers

And their parents.

It was a recipe,

It was a set-up,

For failure.

I was not alone.

There were seventeen other 22 year olds

Scattered throughout the city.

When I resigned,

Two months in,

Ten others resigned

Right after me.

Now at least

I am the only volunteer.

When I resign this time

There will not be a queue

Behind me.

Aftermath

The storm promised big, potentially harmful, things, and, at least here, delivered rain and now, blue skies.  Today I can see and think straight.  Yay!  In a little while I will drive south to interview for a volunteer job which would use the training and gifts I have to offer.  There are more ways to be paid than money.

The storm

Promised big things

And left:

Well-watered ground,

Blue skies,

Cleared thoughts,

A world set

For green and growth.

The storm

Promised big things

And left us

With today.

Volunteer

Today I begin to coordinate a support group for staff at the Clinic where I volunteer.  When I volunteered to do this, the group was thought to address one issue.  Last week one of the two clinic sites completely flooded, destroying all the records.  That site will not re-open, and all the staff and patients have been consolidated to one location.  Yesterday was the first day with everyone together.  When people gather this afternoon, we will see what is needed.

Amazing are the things

Which need

A volunteer.

I count hours as a counselor

Volunteer

For free supervision.

Still it seems

Nothing ever really

Comes free.

Unknown strings,

Untied shoelaces

Trip me up,

No matter how much

Volunteer paperwork

I turn in.

There are always more I-s to be dotted,

T-s to be crossed.

The last jot and tittle

Won*t be discovered

Until after everything we know

Has been said and done.

Still amazing

Those things which require

A volunteer,

No tit for tat

Nothing ventured

Nothing gained

Nothing ever quite

What it seems.

There is more than enough

Volunteer work,

Free supervision

Or not.

There is always more than enough.

Every single bit counts.

We will know where it figures into the big picture

When all is said and done,

When the very last piece

Is set in place.