Gold leaves

More steps in gold leaves.

I wake and wonder

What next steps

I shall take,

What next steps

I shall put off

For now.

I know

They will come later.

I am on the road

To Oz.

Gold leaves

Cover the front walk.

My companions are often

Unlikely.

I am on the road

To Somewhere.

Gold leaves

Blanket the front walk

And yes

The back yard

As well.

Which door

Shall I use?

My companions offer

Different possibilities.

They search

For brains

For courage

For heart.

Gold leaves show us

The way.

We

All of us

Search for Home.

Still the door must first be opened

This means what you need it to mean. We all have doors, and we all must determine who we will open them to, much more who we will invite in for tea. 

They come up the front walk,

Wonder whether they will be welcomed

At the door,

Or even

Invited in.

Momentary visitors,

They occasion a tentative knock.

Perhaps the door will open,

This time.

Perhaps a cup of tea

Might be offered,

This time.

So many steps

So many knocks

But still

The door must first

Be opened.

So much more

Rich day yesterday... all around.

So much more of the world

Comes more clear

When I sit

In that small room

With its window to the outside world,

Its door

To the inside.

I hear the voices

On all sides,

Even from above.

I wonder

What I could possibly hear

Next.

Fog

Foggy frame of mind.  And me... with it.

I am grateful

For fog.

Somehow it allows my own

Misty

Foggy

Frame of mind,

As if this is natural

Appropriate

Normal even,

This morning fog,

And me

With it.

I drive the daughter to school

We discuss morning things.

We discuss next year.

Headlights in the fog.

And then

She is out the door.

O Come, Thou Key of David

I carry keys on my key ring which open doors I no longer need to open.  The master church key is really five keys, and still I cannot open every door.  Strangely, every one with any assortment of church keys can open my office door.  From whence security?

Where is the key

To this particular door?

Mary and Joseph stayed

In the stable out back

Of the inn.

No key necessary,

Only the security of those who watched:

Animals

Shepherds

Angels

A Star

Wise folk.

Where is the key

On the seeming endless key ring

We all carry

In our pockets?

Where is the key

To this particular door?

A baby born,

No key necessary

In fact

No lock whatsoever

Open to all.

When you told me you might have left

I live with the illusion that I am not easily fazed.  Except it seems I am.  Surprise.  Other people*s decisions affect me.  Surprise.  My decisions affect other people.  All the time.  The door swings both ways.

When you told me

You might have left

Except

Then

You didn*t,

I was surprised,

Even shocked,

At the depth

Of my sadness

Even though

You are still here

For now.

We are not even close friends.

The hinge that links

Our lives

Swings the door this way,

Then that.

Sometimes we don*t see each other

For days.

Still

I was shocked,

Even surprised.

I know the time will come

When I awaken,

Open the front door

For the morning paper,

Find the for sale sign

On your lawn

Swinging in the wind

And me

Shocked and surprised
Sad

Even then.