For what it's worth

I have gradually figured out that I was trying to change vocations, when the vocation as priest has been central all along.  The letters after my name do not matter.  I will keep the CADC because it allows me to maintain liability insurance and signals my interest in assisting those struggling with a range of addictions.  Even though the addictions field has more letters than any other.  I mean: IAODAPCA  (really).  I even know what each letter stands for :).  For what it's worth.  And this is worth a lot. 

For what it’s worth

And it seems worth

A lot

I find myself

Subtracting

And subtracting

Letters after my name

So the letter politicians

Cannot claim me,

Decide my place

In the system of mental health.

I have reclaimed the Church

As my primary home

Its letters and substrates

Its seeming silly ways

To rename basements

And vestibules

Its way of determining

Every single person

A Child of God

No matter what diagnosis

The letter politicians claim,

No matter what.

For what it’s worth

And it is worth more

Than I could ever ask

Or imagine.

We are never paid what we are worth

I write this knowing it may not be heard as politically correct.   I write it as a first level licensed professional counselor (LPC) who has both so much particular experience (as priest) and not enough countable experience (as therapist) to be employed in a system which will only reimburse second level licensed counselors (LCPC).   Both seem to be used as reasons not to employ me.  I suspect, once again, it is, in part, a translation issue.  I may as well be speaking Pakistani.  

But really, beyond the counseling profession, in all of life, none of us is ever paid what we are worth.  

I am coming into my last week at internship.  It has been a blessing, all the way around.... the men in the halfway house, the counselors.  I have watched lives changed almost weekly.  I have paid for the experience.  It is well worth it.  In reality, I could never pay enough.

I have never been paid what I*m worth.

No one has.

A friend worked in Pakistan.

It was customary for foreigners to hire young men

To run errands.

The friend thought it demeaning

To the young men.

So he didn*t do it.

He was brought around by a particular young man.

In Pakistani the young man said

This is how I make my living,

It is an honorable living.

He was hired.

Happily he ran errands.

He was paid the going rate.

Of course

The rate was not

What the man was worth.

It never is.

I have never been paid what I*m worth

No one has.

I am a priest with degrees and licenses,

Soon a certificate.

I have years and years

Of experience.

Every place I go

There are things to learn,

People to learn from.

Most of my experience now

Is not for pay.

Still I need to be paid.

This is how I make my living

It is an honorable living.

I will never be paid what I am worth.

No one ever is.