Exponential

Some days it feels like my heart grows, like the Grinch, at least three sizes. Sometimes way more. It's not one thing that does it, but several, some things I can name, some not.

My heart grows,

Sometimes it feels

Exponentially.

I wonder where things

Will fit

With a bigger heart.

I wonder

When I sit in back at church

See baby faces smiling backward

Check the restless children

Feel the Spirit move

Watch everyone raise an arm in blessing

Myself included,

Hold the hand of my beloved

As we pray the Lord’s Prayer.

Exponentially

My heart grows.

I wonder where things will go

From here.

Pentecost efficient

So many ways to define efficiency. We are still wearing our red. though now a nap break has overtaken us. Still...we feel efficient. Who else has run the same car (red!) through two different car washes before one in the afternoon. Yes... I know there are more expedient ways to do this. But still...look at all the time left in this day?

We managed to wear red today,

Make it to a middle service,

Have four good conversations,

Fill up the gas tank,

Get the car washed,

Order and eat breakfast,

Get the car washed again,

Then home before one.

We are feeling efficient:

Pentecost efficient.

Holy Spirit efficient.

Here we are at home,

Just after one.

We consider

What’s next.

Sighs too deep

 I am not the family sigh-er.  Somehow my beloved and I have switched roles.  I sit and breathe and sigh.  These sighs have been stored a long time.  Beautiful even in a spun silk kind of way.  Perhaps I will weave them into a scarf.

Sighs too deep for words

Silver gray yet somehow light.

They rise.  They rise.

Humility of ear

I never know what will land in my inbox.

"The Christian church came into being at Pentecost. The gift of the Holy Spirit on that occasion is generally called the gift of tongues, but it might equally as well be called the gift of ears…. As writers, readers, human beings, we cannot speak to or understand each other unless we are first prepared to listen. Of all the gifts that the Holy Spirit is able to bestow, the one for which we should first and most earnestly pray is humility of ear."

                                          -W. H. Auden

                                          Source: Words and the Word

On this

The day after the feast

Of Pentecost

Auden lands

In my inbox,

Reminds me

There are so many gifts

Of the Spirit

And I

I sit in my blue chair

Organize the week  

In humility of ear,

Not knowing if anything

I say or pray

Will come out

In any particular way.

And I

I sit in my blue chair

And wait

For what comes next.

Save the poetry

It matters what we read. It matters what we place before our eyes.  I do like what I am already doing.  It fits with my soul.  Today I got notice that the Holy Spirit is following me on Twitter.  This is so much better than  random job listings.  I also receive poetry in my inbox every morning.  I will keep poetry and God reminders in front of me.

I survey what arrives

Every morning.

It*s time

To clear out

The job listings,

Look at

What I am already doing,

Hold it up

To the light.

I cancelled the first listing

Today.

Then I read

Three of the daily poems.

I saw

The Holy Spirit now follows me

On Twitter.

I kept that one.

Everyone should keep reminders

Of God

In his inbox,

Reminders of God

In her inbox.

Now I make sure

To save

The poetry.

I forgot I had wings

Getting my system cleared of the mood-altering medication has made an amazing difference.  I tried to give it back to the doctor... it does not come cheap... but found it cannot be returned like bad canned goods.  There is no recycling program for such medications.   

Anyway, I*m glad I was off the medication in time for Convention.  I was able to witness the Spirit blowing there.  Though the exercise on Friday was to spread out our arms to be open to embrace another, I saw a roomful of people lifted into possible flight, with feathers and hollow bones, and all.  I had forgotten I had wings.

Again

The Holy Spirit blows through.

It provides the lift

Under my wings.

I forgot I had wings.

We all

Have wings

When we spread our arms.

One week out it seems the drug

Is out of my system.

There are more connections,

More possibilities.

But It is so much more than this.

The Spirit provides the lift

Under the wings

I had forgotten about,

Forgotten until I spread out my arms,

Noticed I was held up,

Lighter

Than air.

Only then I felt the feathers,

The hollow bones,

The Spirit that holds me up,

The Spirit

That lifts me up.

No heaviness here.

Only feathers and hollow bones.

I am lifted up.

The Spirit catches the air

Under my wings.

I learn again what it is

To fly.

Reminder of Easter

I have no social commentary on Bin Laden*s death or the particulars surrounding it.  Others have mined the Scriptures for words which condemn or allow for celebration.  That is not mine.  Like many, I feel mixed and jumbled.  This reflection is what I do know.  

We are in the season

Of the Risen Jesus.

He is with us awhile.

He walks through closed doors,

Shows his scars,

Gives advice from the shore,

Grills fish.

Jesus joins us on the road.

He waits to be invited

To dinner.

He holds all that happens now.

He holds it,

The whole mix of things.

Jesus assures us that the Comforter

Will be sent to sit with us

Walk with us

Eat with us

Give advice from the shore.

It will be different

But the same.

After this season

Now

The Comforter is with us

Until Jesus comes again.