Disappointment

Perhaps the kitten will cheer her up.

Disappointment arrives

For a visit.

I’m not sure how long

She will stay.

I have put her in the guest room

With the kitten.

Perhaps the kitten

Will cheer her up.

It is difficult

To remain uncheered

In the presence of a kitten:

Chasing flies

Springing off the walls

Placing a water bottle cap

In the toe of every shoe

She finds.

Trinity

I woke up this morning thinking about writing that owl reflection.  It is such a cool picture: three barn owls peering out of a rounded cross shaped window.  So I began.  The owls have yet to make their appearance.  Instead I remembered that breakfast with Possibility and Disappointment, and the later meeting I had with my therapist/supervisor/consultant.  Perhaps you could all hold hands, he said. Maybe you could close the circle.  

I am not on the roster

To preach

Yet every time

Trinity Sunday rolls around

I think what I might say

To clear things up

This time.

A few weeks ago now

I had breakfast with

Disappointment

And Possibility,

Just the three of us.

We all walked under the crabapple.

Possibility and I

Held Disappointment*s hands.

What if all three of you

Held hands,

Closed the circle

In the backyard

And danced?

He asked.

What if?

This morning I think

Why that would be

Perichoresis.

If we danced fast enough

No one

Could tell us apart.

Better

It is good to have friends who notice.

It is better

She says

To have breakfast

With the likes of Disappointment,

In the spring,

When the weather is warmer,

The light is clearer,

The trees full-blossomed.

How was breakfast

This weekend?

She asked.

I replied

I think we*re getting somewhere,

Wherever somewhere is.

Possibility as the guest of honor

When I went to bed last night I realized that my vision for the morning had Possibility and me holding Disappointment*s hands.  I hadn*t realized Disappointment was a little girl.  She is.  I wonder what she will look like... all grown up.  I imagine she will still be late for breakfast, and prefer cocoa in her bunny mug,  Maybe I can teach her how to weed.  Then again, maybe not.

As I lay in bed

Last night

I went over the guest list

And plans

For the morning.

I realized I had invited

Possibility

As the guest of honor.

She wears her silver hair

In a practical bob.

Sure enough

She arrived wearing blue jeans,

Hiking boots,

A workshirt.

She brought her garden tools

With her,

Ready to do some weeding with me

After breakfast.

When Disappointment arrives

As she surely will

(Truly

She is most always

Late)

We will feed her eggs and toast

Find her special bunny mug

With two handles,

One on either side,

Pour her

Steaming hot cocoa.

Disappointment looks

Like she always has:

Very young.

Pigtails.

A pinafore.

She has never

Gotten any older.

She does not know how to distinguish

A weed

From anything.

After breakfast

Possibility and I

Will take Disappointment for a walk

Under the flowering trees.

We will each

Take a hand.

We may point out an occasional weed

But most of all

We will help Disappointment look up,

Notice the blossom-laden trees.

Possibility and I

Will predict the fruit.

Possibility for breakfast

I am getting settled into the idea that I will probably not get that final license.  Of course, when I really think about it, I am already doing what I feel called to do, half-licensed though I am.  So I will sit at breakfast with Disappointment and Possibility tomorrow and we will take a walk under the flowering trees after we eat.

I think I will invite Possibility

For breakfast

In the morning

While the others sleep in.

I will make scrambled eggs,

Rye toast

And a pot of strong coffee

For us to share.

Disappointment may join us

For a time,

Share a bite or two.

I will even set her a place

At the table.

Maybe she will feel better

After a walk in the backyard

Under the deep pink

Crabapple tree.

The petals may be falling

By then.

Maybe the redbud in front

Will make

A similar offering.

Maybe Possibility and I

Will each hold a hand,

Walk Disappointment

Under the falling

pink/purple blossoms.

Disappointment for breakfast

This morning I am skipping the Thursday work-out and sitting with disappointment for breakfast.  She may have a thing or two to teach me.  What exactly, I have no idea.  That*s why I need to pay attention.

I vowed to make friends

With Disappointment,

Pour her a cup of coffee

At the breakfast table,

Exchange sections of the morning paper,

Sit and make morning chit-chat,

Watch the back lawn

Grow greener.

Her face looks like a prune.

She needs more than a laugh

Or two.

I wonder

Which comic strip

Appeals to her sense of humor?

Does she even have

A sense of humor?

Is it dark or silly?

Does she see the oddness

In my asking?

Which cereal would she like

Topped with strawberries?

One or two servings of fruit

Is a good way

To start the day.

Even for someone

Named Disappointment.

Does her name

Cause her distress?

What were her parents thinking?

Whatever were they thinking?

She sits across from me

In her mismatched PJs

Uncombed hair.

Let me warm up your cup of coffee

I say.

Let me give you a warmer.